Four months…that is a long time to stay away from home. I look at the speaker’s face.”But that is also home with son, daughter, and their family settled in Toronto and Calgary.
Our flight from Mumbai to Toronto, Canada, via Zurich, is half full with grandparents winging their way to grandchildren in different cities of Canada and America. It is school vacation time and grandparents are family baby sitters. Talking to one, on adjoining centre seats, I learn that the couple look forward to this annual visit. The caveat ‘as long it lasts’. Once the grandchildren enter teens they do not want caregivers as are busy with their school, sports and other activities. Grand parents are redundant as this friend found out on a recent visit to her daughter in Colorado. The daughter invited them but they got thoroughly bored. ‘How long can one watch TV.’ They did not feel confident to venture on their own, buy bus tickets and see the city and waited for daughter to entertain them in her and her families free time. d
Majority Indian parents are dependent on children for movement, (there are exceptions) and unless they learn to venture around on their own, life in any American, Canadian city is excruciatingly boring. The Indian temples, Gurdwaras, Mosques are welcome places especially on Sundays. Parents are dropped in the morning and picked after the community kitchen (temple I visited). Some make friends and look forward to weekends.
A mother felt ‘useless’ with electronic gadgets, changing food habits, television programs etc dictating lifestyle she did not know where to fit. It is not the same scenario for everyone. Maya set her own agenda from morning timetable till evening and she had her calendar full. She helped her family but then she needed her ‘me time.’ Another mother would ask to be dropped to the library as soon as daughter, son-in-law and grandchildren returned from office and school. She was clear that she has contributed her share and period. Sometimes it is disheartening to watch tottering aged parents wait at bus stops to receive grandchildren ( Brampton, Toronto) and carry their loaded satchels home. I think it is confined to Asian diaspora as I saw other Asian grandparents in similar exercise.
Return flight was again teeming with grandparent passengers returning home, their job done, to fly again next year, happy in the thought that they are needed. I remember someone telling me that his brother and wife no longer invite the parents because no one has the time to entertain old parents or their medical problems.
Our three plus granddaughter would love to brag about her visit to the zoo/libraries with her grandparents. Her friends would chip in with their own grandparent stories and it would be fun listening to embellished tales.
Toronto: A group of immigrants were complaining about fresh-of-the-boat-immigrants (more than 300,000 per year), of how they are burdening the infrastructure, the laws etc forgetting that once they too sailed/flew in from their respective countries to start afresh. There is an endless flow, professionals and refugees being offered a slice of Canadian sky and land.
Media reports and tv channels highlight the burgeoning crime rate in Toronto City and its environs, the frequent breakdowns on the tottering Toronto subway system, the beleaguered education system, the resistant to inoculation, educators strike, children misplaced, one report cited nearly 40,000 children missing every year.
The legalisation of Cannabis for medicinal and leisure purposes might be a cash cow for the government but for citizens a health hazard. One cannot walk through certain downtown streets and alleys as the air is thick with cannabis smoke and I often had to cover my face if by chance I was somewhere in the vicinity of smokers. Cigarette smoke was unhealthy but this is a ritual suicide pact that authorities have imposed on public. The opening of special de-addiction or safe addiction centres in the city might help control rampant addiction but I think it is hitting out in the dark. Travelling on subways one comes across young men and women asking for money for lame reasons, buying tickets, etc but it is not rocket science to decipher the reason for their begging.(https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Cannabis_in_Canada)
The rising accident rates, murders, homicides, suicides, robberies and break-ins….. Old timers say their city (Toronto) was never this way. They remember the peaceful streets, safe driving, no honking (now it is common sound in the neighbourhoods). It is a never ending litany and at one time I had to walk out.
Unionville, Brampton, Mississauga …. White neighbourhoods but slowly the colour changed to brown, black and yellow. Driving down Brampton streets one is transported to Punjab (India roads) and one begins to question the sanity of uprooting oneself if one wants to continue with old lifestyle.
There are areas within areas; Korea Town, Little Italy, India Street, European, Middle Eastern pockets….Sometimes newly minted citizens follow their own rules as a Middle Eastern father refusing to let his daughter learn music as it was against his culture. Not so friendly advice was to return from where he had come from if he did not want to adjust to his new environment.
No wonder Justin Trudeau felt no qualms dressing up as a ‘brown face’ for his school function. There are too many around to notice any faux pas. He won the election.
It is similar scenario in other Canadian cities with the open stretched out spaces helping absorb the ramifications of never ending stream if newer migrants.
Back in Pune it was our old routine of morning walks and lunch outings. We avoid evening drive-ins in the city because of office-returnees-congested streets and unruly traffic. The two wheeler menace is increasing and no matter how much you honk the scooterist refuses to let go of the road.Water logging, illegal parking add to the menace and of since my returnI prefer to enjoy evenings in the peaceful environs of my society.
The rains continue, climate change, and though it is clean green air we breathe, too much of water is harmful. Mosquitoes are proliferating specially in the low lying areas and the slums. Dengue cases multiply.
On the cheerful side I am enjoying my freshly brewed Masala Chai (spiced tea) lounging in my patio listening to raindrops falling on the rooftop. My sense of space.